Pop goes the weasel

Things started out fine till after lunch when I had to drop my colleague off for what was to be a quick meeting. It turned out to last 1 hour and all that time, I sat in my car under the blistering sun - waiting. With my car devoid of reading material, I resorted to the only available item - the car manual.

Do not laugh. It gets better and it comes in handy. I promise.

After that, we were off to Selayang to pick up some documents. Whee… here we go trundling down life’s highway. Picked up a keat-chai shuin-mui drink (sour plum with lime juice) to quench our thirst. Then a phone call came in.

Could we swing by Berjaya Times Square in the heart of Kuala Lumpur to pick up a check? Could we? I was all of half an hour’s drive away and I was to turn into the city at 4.15pm? I said yes, we could. Its a cheque after all.

This is where it starts to get good.

I drop my colleague at Plaza Berjaya which is just opposite Times Square and I told him I’ll take a turn and pick him up from the front of the building after he’s picked up the cheque. Good idea right? However, as I was pulling away from the curb, something did not feel right.

I was wondering why the road was so bumpy. There was construction ongoing and lots of little stones on the road so I thought it might be that. However, the bumpiness continued as I took my turn to end up in front of Berjaya Times Square.

And this is the part it really gets good.

My car tyre was flat. Punctured. Bocor. Kemek. Flat as the literal pancake.

I wasn’t quite sure what to think at that point. I looked at my colleague who looked back and me and said “Where is the jack?” and I said “In my handbag. Where do you think the bloody jack is?!”

After that question there was no way I was letting him near my car! So a quick phone call to Toyota’s 24 hour assist confirmed that yes, they do help damsels in distress who need changing of a punctured car tyre. So, I settled down for a 25 minute wait for the mechanic while I pondered the irony of my just having read the car manual on how to change a car tyre!

20 minutes later, the mechanic came up on his motorcycle, whipped out his wrench and jack and proceeded to get to work. I was very happy that he did not give me a “Useless woman driver” look but instead was helpful and quick to do the job with minimum chatter. With my conversational cantonese limited to ordering food, I don’t think I could have carried on a conversation with anyone that did not involve me saying “Yat woun hor fan” or “Oi lat chiu” or “kon loh meen” at any point in time.

5 minutes later, I was all ready to go, with my spare tyre in place. It was interesting to note that I was parked right in front of Berjaya Times Square on a busy afternoon with many people walking around and my flat tyre in full view, yet not one single person offered to help change my flat tyre.

I took the car to a nearby tyre shop to see if they could patch it up, but apparently they could not, because the tear was on the side of the tyre which they said was a weak point. It was quite a big hole for the air never stopped hissing out of it - a steady audible hiss. Very worrying. Apparently this could only be caused by a strong impact which means I must have caused the damage when I hit a pothole or a curb. Can I sue DBKL for not patching up the potholes in the city, thereby causing damage to my tyre?

So, I had to get the tyre changed. RM175 poorer and 1 hour later, I was back on the road with a brand new tyre.

So what have we learnt today, boys and girls?

• Always make sure you have your spare tyre in your car. I was very surprised that the Toyota Assist helpline would ask me “Do you have a spare tyre?” Doesn’t everyone?
• Always sign up with a service ala Toyota Assist or AAM or any other service provider or make sure your car insurance has such services. They come in very handy. I read in the manual that Toyota Assist will even deliver petrol to you if you run out and get stranded! I told you reading the car manual came in handy!
• Learn how to change a car tyre. I should have pretended I could, if only so some strong strapping young man could stop and do it for me. Otherwise, call your service provider. Even AAM does it now. They did not use to before.
• Do not drive into potholes or over curbs at top speed or at all. Not only do you damage your tyres, you also damage your wallet.
• Finally, NEVER ever ask a woman driver where the jack is. If you don’t know you’re better off just keeping quiet.

So now my car has 1 new tyre and will be getting a new antenna. I haven’t replaced the one that got stolen. 6 months old and already demanding presents! Kids these days…

******

And after all that, here’s an except of a strangely hilarious conversation I had today. An unknown person called my handphone and when I answered the following conversation ensued:

Me: Hello?
Caller: (In cantonese) The number is 73225198
Me: ??? Sorry you’ve got the wrong number.
Caller: (In cantonese) This is Ah Wah’s number! 73225198
Me: ??!!! Wrong number lah…
Caller: Ngor hai Mother! Um hai wrong number!! (In cantonese - I’m Mother, not wrong number!”
Me: o_O

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